Meltdown

Tuesday, May 29th was Meltdown Day. We all woke up with nightmares including Gavin, the baby. Jamie went back to work after the Memorial Holiday. At six in the morning he was down whaling the punchbag Team Tess got him for working out his issues and anger when the stress levels reached red level. I went out to fix the one oscillating sprinkler that wouldn't oscillate and couldn't find it. I was sure Jamie had thrown it away before I had a chance to fix or return it. Poor Jamie, totally innocent. But I had a crying fit over a sprinkler because I didn't want to think I was crying over Tess. Tom called and was moaning because he had only one pair of pants to wear because he has lost so much weight and he had an acre of flowers to water because I was at Tess's and it hadn't rained. Meantime, Jamie is worried about all the watering he has to do here. Alison was on vacation and when Beck wouldn't sleep and the crib broke down and they couldn't get a new one in the car, broke down into crying fits. Talk about displacement! All of us wailing over something tangible and beating it up because we can't beat on the cancer.

Tess is shouting Where is my team? Where is my Team? My whole Team has crumpled! I have no backup plan! No Team Two in training! You guys have to get your shit together...Now! We haven't even started chemo and reconstruction. Enough. Don't let this happen again! This is not acceptable!